>This weekend we made a trek across Iowa to visit with my family in Tabor. As always, it was bittersweet. It is so nice to see Grandpa and the rest of my family that I always enjoy, and it is so sad to have the absence of Grandma Dalene meeting you at the door to her home.
I have so many fond memories of my childhood from Grandma and Grandpa’s farm. I remember when I was a kid we always got together for every birthday. We would have cake and ice cream and spend an evening together. Us kids would tear apart the basement trying to make our own haunted house. I remember playing tunnel tag and wiffle ball in the back yard until it was too dark to see what we were doing.
I very vividly remember making homemade ice cream in the driveway. Wonderful memories of time spent with my family. My whole family. We are still making memories, still spending time together, but it will never be the same.
My Grandpa dug out some family history books so we could take a look at them while we were back. One of the greatest treasures that we came across is a few typed pages, written my Great Great Uncle Edwin. He talks about his childhood and what it was like growing up in a much different time. Some of his memories are heartbreaking, and some of them were quite funny to read…like the time that the family got their first car and my Great Great Grandpa was driving it home and forgot how to stop it…he yelled “whoa! whoa!” but it didn’t stop like families previous form of transportation had!
After our sect of the Howard family had moved from Tabor, to Nebraska, and then to Colorado they were called back to Iowa to help care for my Great Great Great Grandpa Heli who was aging and needed the family around him in his last years. Edwin wrote that it was his job to walk each morning and evening with Grandpa Heli and make sure that he was safe. The thing about this memory that I found so fascinating was that Grandpa Heli would tell Edwin about his childhood growing up on the East coast and how he longed to return to his home. What a gift I have to get to know these memories of family members I wasn’t ever acquainted with.
I guess some things never change. We all look back at our past and miss the times that we had. It is easy to tell ourselves that we should be looking around at what we have and forward to the future, but sometimes the past is so appealing.
I know that if I was still hanging out in the 80’s and eating homemade ice cream at Grandma’s house I wouldn’t have the life I have now, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t miss it.
Memorial Day is a day to remember those that we have lost, and I was happy to spend time remembering my Grandma Dalene, though I have to say I do a little of that everyday, but I also spent quite a bit of time remembering the parts of my own life that I now only have as memories.
If you aren’t familiar with the country song by Trace Adkins, I will post the chorus for you here. This memorial day week I am missing my past, but trying to do a good job of not wishing away these days. If only I could freeze time, I would stay right here for awhile.
You’re gonna miss this
You’re gonna want this back
You’re gonna wish these days hadn’t gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you’re gonna miss this