Grown Ups

I am finally starting to come down from my mommy flip out.  The perfect cap to the pre-long weekend week that I have had.  I can’t even bring myself to recreate the scene for you.  But it ended a little bit like the time that I had to hold Leila down in her car seat while she screamed and frothed at the mouth out of sheer rage, only this time I was the fit thrower, and I didn’t really froth, though I did cry.  And scream. And Yell. After dragging Leila to the car after snatching her out of the hot tub at the Coralville indoor pool, literally dragging her, I settled into my seat and I begged Leila to tell me WHY WHY WHY SHE DOESN’T LISTEN TO ME!  She ignored me, didn’t even look my direction.

This evening she told me that soon I am going to go to heaven and then I won’t be her mom anymore.  I am trying to decide if that was a threat, or a wish. In any case, we both calmed down a bit after we made it home and I asked her again, a bit more calmly why she doesn’t listen to me.  Her response was, “Because Mommy, I don’t want to be the kid, I want to be the grown up.”  I told her that there are a lot of not fun things about being grown up.  But she assured me that she was ready.  I told her that I thought she should concentrate on enjoying kid things, and let me take care of the grown up stuff.  She told me that she didn’t need me.

I took her to bed, covered her up and I said, “Leila, I really hope you know how much I love you.”  She responded with, “Yep, but I don’t love you because you made me get out of the hot tub and took away my air mattress.”

I don’t think she realizes how much I wish I didn’t always have to be the grown up.

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6 Responses to Grown Ups

  1. Dara says:

    :hug Days like that really suck.

  2. Cassie says:

    Can’t say that I would like you very much either, if you took my air mattress. 😉
    ….too soon?

    Tomorrow is a new day. If you need a good laugh, I’ll be the one with the afro visible from space at Van Allen Elementary.

  3. Lori Howard says:

    I think every one of my daughters has played out the scenario you described. I think you all really do love me. Man it hurts like hell when your little darlings say they don’t need you or want you. Love you !

  4. Andrea says:

    Sawyer has been pointing at me and saying, “don’t talk to me!” with a scowl on his face. Ugh… I hate it. I really try to be a nice mommy but it isn’t easy ALL of the time. It really can’t be good for kids to have parents that have it together every moment of the day, right?

  5. Jaclyn says:

    Kids that throw fits and hate their parents are blessed with the best of parents, because they set boundaries and limitations and aren’t afraid to tell them no. Your kids must be blessed with a wonderful mother…congrats and hang in there!

  6. jessica says:

    this sounds EXACTLY like my last friday afternoon. i was in tears before i could even explain to matt how my afternoon went with harley. it was AWFUL. 😦 you are an awesome mother and grown up!

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